Discontinued

Closetplay Sex Toys, Dildos, Reviews, Silicone

Review: Closetplay Speedster

Closetplay Speedster

In October 2021 the sex toy world suffered a huge loss. Geeky Sex Toys, Australia’s first (and, for a long time, only) independent maker of silicone toys, closed their virtual doors. Pioneers of the fantasy genre, they introduced the idea of mixing pop culture with sex toys for all us “naughty nerds” out there, and as it turned out, there were a lot of us. But while they might have been the first to bring us the lightsaber dildo and Pikachu butt plug, they certainly won’t be the last. Many retailers, from other indie makers such as Deep N’ Geek to big brands like The Realm by Blush Novelties, have taken inspiration from Geeky Sex Toys over the years. However, I don’t think any have quite captured their almost chaotic creativity quite like newcomer Closetplay Sex Toys.

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Advent Calendar, Lovehoney, Reviews

Review: Lovehoney Couples Advent Calendar 2021

Lovehoney Advent Calendar 2021

I’ve probably mentioned this once or twice over the years, but I am a huge Christmas person. My decorations go up on November 1st without fail, with practically every element in the house getting switched over to a festive version, from Christmas aprons and tea towels, to Christmas bath mats and pyjamas. I start menu planning months ahead of time and spend most of December in the kitchen, that is when I’m not attending Christmas markets, drinking eggnog or wrapping presents. But one of my absolute favourite parts of Christmas for as long as I can remember has always been the advent calendars. Over the years I’ve watched as they’ve evolved from basic chocolates to luxury varieties filled with things like bath bombs and wine, and I have been 100% here for all of it, regularly having three just to myself (this year’s themes being local craft beer, Back To The Future, and the annual DIY one from my mum, which is usually a mix of tea and candy). The one type of calendar I haven’t tried yet, however, which may be somewhat surprising considering my profession, is sex toys. So this year Christmas feels like it has come early, because Lovehoney have treated me to their very own 2021 “Best Sex Of Your Life” Couples Advent Calendar!

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Clitoral Stimulator, Reviews, Satisfyer, Silicone, USB Rechargeable, Vibrators

Review: Satisfyer Dual Love & Dual Pleasure

Satisfyer Dual Love & Dual Pleasure

From the moment I tried the legendary Pro 2 back in 2016, Satisfyer, and their groundbreaking suction technology, became one of my all time favourite brands. For years this continued, with each Satisfyer being somehow better than the last, until finally culminating in 2019’s Satisfyer Luxury, their most ambitious (and expensive!) toy yet, whose powerful clitoral stimulation made it more than worth the price tag. But after this, things started to change. Satisfyer rebranded, switching their previously luxury feel to one more aimed at newcomers, and begun to release a wide range of products (ending their suction specialisation) at much lower prices than before. Cautiously pessimistic, I held back on reviewing for them for some time after that, until finally I broke my silence when I tried their first app compatible toys, the Curvy 1+ & 2+, around this time last year. With the pair all but confirming my fears about the declining standards of the brand however, it wasn’t the return to Satisfyer I had hoped. So when Betty’s Toy Box recently contacted me about trying the Curvy’s successors, the Dual Pleasure and Dual Love, it seemed only fair to give the brand I once loved so much a second chance.

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Lube, Lucy, Reviews

Review: Lucy Lube

Lucy Lube Front of Bottle

I can’t speak for the rest of the world, but here in Australia we’ve had some pretty lengthy and intensive lockdowns over the past year and a half. In fact, I’m even in one right now, with my home of Melbourne seeming to consistently cop some of the worst of it. But while most of us have been learning the ups and downs of day drinking and watching far too many Godzilla films, some people have clearly been a little bit more productive. In addition to the recent wave of Aussie independent toy makers I discussed in my review of the Faux Phallus Agapanthus, there has also been an even bigger emergence of sexual wellness brands, particularly those that focus on lube. In the span of just a few short months, four new Australian-made lubricants have entered the picture, with three of them being based right here in Melbourne (that’s Lucy Lube, FIGR, LBDO, and Sydney’s Get Frenchie). So whilst I am planning on doing a round-up of all four soon, today I’ll be taking a closer look at one in particular, Lucy Lube!

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Darque Path, Dildos, Reviews, Silicone

Review: Darque Path Cthulhu

Darque Path Cthulhu

Over the last few years I’ve become a massive fan of the work of H.P. Lovecraft and the Mythos he inspired. Growing up with little exposure to horror films or books (even the The Little Mermaid gave me nightmares as a child), his wide collection of short stories has served as the perfect gateway into this world for me, especially when you consider how much of it has formed the basis of the genre today. I often spend evenings reading over annotations of his work (yes, including analysis on the unpleasant racist overtones), have forked out way too much money on the Call of Cthulhu role-playing game, and even though I still have a long way to go with catching up on horror as a film genre, I’ve just recently taken my first steps with John Carpenter’s Apocalypse Trilogy (which was also inspired by Lovecraft). But with my job being what it is, there has always been one thing missing, and that is, of course, a fantasy toy inspired by the most famous of all his creations: Cthulhu. For the longest time I had my eyes on Uberrime’s version, but size concerns and US shipping prices held me back, until finally it disappeared from their store. Just when I thought all was lost however, I discovered Darque Path and their very own interpretation made right here in Australia!

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Bestvibe, Reviews, Silicone, USB Rechargeable, Vibrators

Review: Bestvibe Brush Vibrator

Bestvibe Brush Vibrator

The first time I saw a facial cleansing brush I was sure it was a sex toy in disguise. In fact, even now I don’t think there is another product on the market that resembles a vibrator or suction toy quite as much in regards to both appearance and function as these so called “beauty products”. It looks like I’m not the only one who thinks so either, with facial cleansers since becoming one of the most popular types of DIY types of sex toys. After all, considering the biggest difference between the two is just how socially acceptable they are, you’d be foolish not to try it out and potentially get a fully discreet sex toy free of charge. So if anything I am surprised it has taken this long to see a company take advantage of the fact and attempt to blend the two into one product, and that is exactly what Bestvibe have done with their Brush Vibrator. With the appearance of a facial cleanser, this undercover vibrator is the perfect product for those who require some privacy, with a price that won’t break the bank either.

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