Fantasy

Review: Funzze 9″ Fantasy Dildo

Funzze 9″ Fantasy Dildo

I’ve loved watching the rise of the independent fantasy maker over the last few years, but one downside to the trend is the high costs associated with these products. Now, I don’t mean to imply that these toys aren’t worth their prices, of course they are. The amount of time and effort that goes into creating unique designs and then hand-crafting them to ensure maximum appeal, pleasure and safety is huge, and that’s without even considering the cost of silicone, equipment, and all of the other fees and skill sets required to run any small business. Yet I am also aware that it has created a divide between those who can and those who cannot afford them, therefore making anyone looking for a cheaper option more susceptible to instead accepting, either knowingly or unknowingly, a toy made of unsafe materials as an alternative. So, when I saw Funzze had their own version of a fantasy dildo, and for less than $40 USD, I knew it was something I had to investigate further.

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Review: Funzze Glass Tentacle

Funzze Glass Tentacle

I love browsing the new arrivals section at Funzze to see all the latest sex toys they’re offering. Not only are they surprisingly high-quality and enjoyable products for a white-label retailer (so much so that they dominated last year’s Top 10 Sex Toys), but they are also some of the cheapest on the market. So when I recently saw they had launched a new range of glass toys, my first impression was one of excitement, especially when I noticed their Glass Tentacle dildo, a style I have been wanting to review for a long time. But… after this initial reaction, I hesitated. Even though I regularly talk about glass sex toys and how safe they are, I have actually only reviewed a few, and that was some time ago. Funzze’s options, to make matters even more uncertain, are made of borosilicate glass, yet are not annealed. I ended up doing a lot of research, and you can probably guess the outcome…

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Review: Uncover Creations Tentacle Grinder IV

Uncover Creations Tentacle Grinder IV

If there’s one sex toy that has been at the top of my mind recently, despite reviewing it well over a year ago, it’s the Uncover Creations Tentacle Grinder II. A real stand-out of 2023, it came in at Number 3 in my Top 10 and kick-started a passion for tentacle-themed grinders that has shaped my content going into this year. My recent reviews of Odyssey Toys’ versions, the Coffin Grinder and Kraken Grinder, were constantly compared to it, and whilst the former didn’t quite live up to its tantalising shape, the latter’s use of a penetrable tentacle won me over. Well, it seems that in the year since I last reviewed for them, Uncover Creations have been busy. They have released not one, but two, follow ups to the Tentacle Grinder II, aptly named the III and IV, and lo and behold, the brand new IV also happens to offer a penetrable tentacle. Needless to say, I had to get it.

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Review: Odyssey Toys Coffin Grinder

Odyssey Toys Coffin Grinder

When Odyssey Toys, sister company to one of my favourite indie makers, recently reached out about reviewing their Kraken Grinder, I was so excited. But what was even more exciting was when the package arrived… a very large package that definitely didn’t contain just one item. I opened it a few days before Christmas, and it really did feel like I was getting all my gifts early, as they totally spoiled me with a mix of their own fantasy creations and Godemiche’s newest grinder range. And whilst I tried my best to focus on the Kraken Grinder, anyone who watched the unboxing at my Instagram knows that I immediately fell in love with the Coffin Grinder instead. Functionally, I knew that the Kraken Grinder was probably the better choice for me due to its penetrable nature, yet I just couldn’t shake the way I felt about its even more elaborate twin. So, when Odyssey Toys suggested a follow-up review, I jumped at the chance to finally showcase the Coffin Grinder in all its glory!

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Review: Odyssey Toys Kraken Grinder

Odyssey Toys Kraken Grinder

It’s been a few weeks now since my Top 10 Sex Toys of 2023 went live, and if you’ve had a chance to browse the winners yet, you’ll know that I placed a toy I gave an overly negative review to at Number 3 (what a twist!). That toy is the Uncover Creations Tentacle Grinder II, and even though it has plenty of issues, the fact is that it was one of the most memorable reviews I completed last year. Whilst functionally grinders are very simple, they offer a true blank canvas for toy makers, allowing them to go all in on immersive fantasy designs that resonate with users on a deeper level than just pleasure. And it was exactly this that led me to fall in love with the Tentacle Grinder II, from its detailed Lovecraftian design to its tapered tip for just the slightest amount of insertion. So, when I was recently contacted by another UK-based indie maker, who offers a toy that takes everything I loved about the Tentacle Grinder II and then amps it up another notch? Well, I was all in.

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Review: Midnight Menagerie Teufl

Midnight Menagerie Teufl

It’s been well over a year now since I last reviewed for an Australian independent maker, and oh how things have changed in that time! It feels like just yesterday I was introducing Darque Path and Faux Phallus at the blog, two of the very first local stores to pop up, and now all my dreams have finally come true, with a thriving community of small businesses being located right here down under. One of these such brands is Midnight Menagerie, a Queensland-based shop very much after my own heart. With a range of fantasy designs available in a range of beautiful colours, they also offer TTRPG dice for games such as Dungeons & Dragons, which I’m more than a little partial to. But the thing that most excites me is the variety of size options they offer their toys in, and so when they recently suggested sending me their latest design, the Teufl, I knew it would suit me perfectly.

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