Suction Cup

Review: Funzze 9″ Fantasy Dildo

Funzze 9″ Fantasy Dildo

I’ve loved watching the rise of the independent fantasy maker over the last few years, but one downside to the trend is the high costs associated with these products. Now, I don’t mean to imply that these toys aren’t worth their prices, of course they are. The amount of time and effort that goes into creating unique designs and then hand-crafting them to ensure maximum appeal, pleasure and safety is huge, and that’s without even considering the cost of silicone, equipment, and all of the other fees and skill sets required to run any small business. Yet I am also aware that it has created a divide between those who can and those who cannot afford them, therefore making anyone looking for a cheaper option more susceptible to instead accepting, either knowingly or unknowingly, a toy made of unsafe materials as an alternative. So, when I saw Funzze had their own version of a fantasy dildo, and for less than $40 USD, I knew it was something I had to investigate further.

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Review: Funzze Mini Realistic Dildo

Funzze Mini Realistic Dildo

Recently I’ve been spending a lot of time at r/SexToys helping to answer people’s questions (say hi if you see me!), and I’ve realised most posts fall into one of two categories. There are the beginners who have no idea where to start or what would work best for them, and then there is the exact opposite: people who know exactly what they want and just need help finding it. It’s made me more aware of just how versatile our desires can be, with many of these requests being for toys outside of the norm (hence why they’re struggling to locate them), particularly when it comes to sizing. I’m so accustomed to the average 18cm / 7″ length and 3.8cm / 1.5″ diameter of penetrables that I barely even stop to think about it, yet it seems there are plenty of people out there yearning for something different, from toys that are long and thin, short and thick, and every possible combination in between. So, when Funzze approached me about collaborating with them, I was instantly intrigued when I saw the Mini Realistic Dildo in their new arrivals.

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Review: Lovense Gravity

Lovense Gravity

I’ve been writing about sex toys for over eight years now, yet I’ve surprisingly only reviewed six thrusters, with two of those being this year. I suppose two isn’t really enough to declare that 2023 is the “year of the thruster”, but because I don’t try them very often, it feels like it is to me. Plus, I have a lot more on the way, starting with today’s review on the Lovense Gravity. An accordian-style thruster (of which I have two others, whilst the rest are split between magnetic-style and stretch-style), Lovense have added their usual high-tech touch to the product, making this innovative toy quite unlike any of the other handheld sex machines I’ve tried. Offering vibrations alongside the thrusting, it is also compatible with the Chinese brand’s comprehensive range of apps for greater control over both bluetooth and wifi. Making this not only an exciting thruster for solo use, but the perfect option for those in long-distance relationships or online sex work.

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Review: AcmeJoy Ferrill Thruster

AcmeJoy Ferrill Thruster

I’m a big fan of Dildo Nightmares, and whenever I see a toy that fits the brief, I can’t help but share it to my socials. In this regard, the AcmeJoy Ferrill Thruster has become a regular, with its realistic dual-stimulator style growth that looks straight out of an eldritch abomination. It never fails to freak people out and get some laughs, something I’m always more than happy to provide. So, when AcmeJoy recently reached out and asked if I would like to review something from their store, it was the first thing that came to my mind. Then, perhaps against my better judgement, I requested it, and now here we are. I do wonder, as the thing sits across from me, am I now cursed for daring to put something so depraved inside of myself? Mostly likely, but alas, let us continue with the review.

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Review: Love to Love Dildolls Utopia

Love to Love Dildolls Utopia

An unexpected positive to how much time we’ve all collectively spent inside over the last few years, has to be the rise of the independent sex toy maker. But as these silicone artisans continue to elevate what we previously thought was possible, with dildos and other non-electrical toys available for the first time in a huge range of shapes, styles, and colours, it’s starting to make the bigger brands realise that we aren’t going to be satisfied with just flesh tones and pinks and purples any longer. Rather, we want the same level of choice and innovation when it comes to dildos as with vibrators and suction toys. So, when I first saw the Dildolls range by French manufacturer Love to Love, I knew they got it, and it’s been no surprise to me that these eye-catching toys have since become such a sensation.

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Review: SquarePegToys Nathan Firmer

SquarePegToys Nathan Firmer

One of last year’s stand-out posts for me has to be my review of the SquarePegToys G squeeze. Coming in at Number 3 in my Top 10 Sex Toys of 2021, I don’t think it’d be an exaggeration to say it was also one of the year’s most anticipated reviews, and has since become one of my most popular too. Taking on the often under-appreciated vaginal plug and reimagining it for the future, the only thing that equalled my love for the G squeeze was my desire to try more from the US maker. So when Peepshow Toys reached out to me recently to let me know SquarePegToys had a new release on the horizon that they were exclusive retailers for, I couldn’t have said yes to reviewing it quicker.

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